Why is this man STILL getting chances?

After numerous incidents, running back Ricky Williams has been suspended for a full year from the NFL.
Why?
'Cause Ricky just can't keep away from pot.
He just loves to get wasted.
So much that he'll lose roughly 8.5 million dollars this year in salary.
He's been suspended before, been disciplined.
Did it do any good?
Nope.
Still a pothead.
I'm not going to judge except on this basis:
It IS AGAINST THE LAW, and AGAINST THE RULES OF THE NFL!!!
So Ricky got suspended, and he'll lose 8.5 million.
Well, sort of.
In an effort to boost their ticket sales, the Toronto Argonauts of the CFL
signed him up. Roughly 300,000 dollars US for his services.
God only knows how much he'll make in endorsements and merchandise.
Hmmmm....I used to look at the CFL as a place of class, but they've just thrown that out the window.
"Got a lawbreaker that can run like a motherfucker that does drugs? We'll sign him up!!!
We're cheap whores that'd sign Bin Laden if he could play the game!"
I hope Toronto loses every single game this year.
I also hope some enterprising linebacker shatters his leg so
bad he'll never walk straight, let alone PLAY the game ever again.
It's what he deserves, obscurity and poverty, because this pile of garbage
can't play by the rules. He is gifted by nature with a body of incredible skill, but he just CAN'T stay away from drugs.
What a loser.

My Typical Customer

Note: This is at the part time gig, the place with blue and gold for colors that rents movies.
The above pictured individual is a fairly accurate composite of
the average putz who wanders in my door.
Now, working there, one might assume I have some film knowledge,
and I do. Add in my long time fascination with flicks, and whole
boatloads of info gained via the brainy and well informed folks
over at DVD Verdict, and yeah, I've got pretty good info at my
disposal.
Now if some the nimrods who wander in could actually frame an
intelligent question about film, I'd be thrilled.
The "Where is such and such flick?" questions are fine, they don't know exactly where
it might be, and under what category, so ask the guy at the counter.
"What do you recommend if I want a good comedy?" is not too bad,
but if they tell me their favorite comedy is American Pie, I'm not going to
tell them about GOOD films, just the current retarded comedy hit,
(for those who wish to know, it's The Ringer or Grandma's Boy), no sense wasting
a great flick like Snatch on them.
The epitome of stupidity is the "huh?" customer as I call them.
They're not stuck for where a title might be, they're not curious as to if an
unknown flick might be any good, their problem is theiy're not sure which door
they're supposed to open to get out of the house in the morning.
"Hey, do you have "Snakes On A Plane?"
"Well, no sir, that film isn't due to be released until 4th of the July week, generally, we don't get films BEFORE
they hit the theater."
"Oh, OK, do you have The DaVinci Code?"
"Um, no, it's currently IN theaters, they'd really take a hit on
ticket sales if you could rent it here instead."
"Oh, no problem, let me get X-Men 3 then."

"By any chance are your mother and father brother and sister as well?"

Who Would You Like to Sue Today?

"More I think about it, ol' Billy was right,
Let's kill all the laywers, let's kill 'em tonight"
I have some....interesting neighbors.
That's the short version of it.
My upstairs neighbor recently pounded on my
door at nearly 11: 00 at night.
Fearing some emrgency, I opened,
and it was indeed a huge problem.
"I just got back from my doctor,
and it's horrible! Terrible!"
Thinking that some terrible diagnosis
had been handed to her, I inquired as to the trouble.
"He looked at my new MRI, and I'm getting BETTER!"
What.
The.
Fuck.
"Who am I gonna sue now?"
She's had some back issues, resulting from a
questionable work injury, and they've gotten
better. And she's.....pissed?
Yep, if she's getting better, she can't sue her
former employers, and she can't get disability, either.
Her lawsuits against everyone under the sun
for her various problems apparently are her
only reason to exist.
What is wrong with this world?
If I had a severely disabling condition,
and a new MRI showed some improvement,
personally I'd be thrilled.
Not her, she's mad because the possibility of a free ride
is shot to hell by her getting better.
She's all kinds of mad because she....
might have to go out and get a goddamn job.
I work 80+ fucking hours a week, bitch.
Get used to life.
A buddy of mine in California is trying to sue
the disability people for "dropping him".
He was in a car accident.
They say he's not completely disabled,
hence their cutting him off. Their view is that
he needs to get off his arse and get a job, and
maybe lose a hundred pounds.
They're predicting rosy health if he does that.
But he's trying to sue, the state, disability, his former employers,
the company he tried to get a job from, but he's not suing the GUY
THAT FUCKING HIT HIM!!!
He's looking for a big payday, so he can sit on his arse and do nothing
for the rest of his natural days.

Now, certain (REPUBLICAN SCUM) lawmakers are trying to institute
reforms, and in some ways, I agree.
People like the ones I've mentioned have no business suing anyone.
Nor does a stupid bitch that puts a cup of burning hot coffee in her crotch while driving.
But these (CORRUPT DIRTBAGS) lawmakers don't want to end just
frivolous lawsuits, they want to end liability for any big company.
So you can make a lethal product that kills or disfigures people,
and they have no recourse for their misery.
Methinks a happy medium must be sought.
We have companies being put to major troubles
because of these idiots.
I purchased a product awhile back.
It told me to use caution as it might be flammable.
Really?
Better be careful, then, right?
Only trouble is,
it's a GODDAMN FIREPLACE LOG!!!!
It had damn well BETTER be flammable!!!
'Cause if it ain't?
I'm suing someone.

American rudeness in San Jose?

You might have heard about this.
Several thousand fans in the HP Pavilion decided that a few fans booing one of the Sharks players in Edmonton deserved to have their entire country insulted. Yes, my homeys thought that booing the Canadian Freaking National Anthem was the OK thing to do to repay a few boors in Edmonton who booed a PICTURE of Joe Thornton that was unfortunately shown during OUR Anthem.
That's the way we do it nowadays, person A does something dumb, so person B goes out of their way to show they they can be a complete, utter and total jackoff in doing something even stupider. You know, because they gotta show 'em. Gotta make sure person A knows they're not afraid of them. So let's just say a few Canadian fans are interviewed beforew tonight's game and they say that the American fans are classless boobs for booing. (They ARE, by the way) The natural reply for the San Jose fans will be to burn Canadian flags, smash all their Rush CD's, and wave a picture of the Queen on fire.
And really, we actually wonder why people think the USA is full of ignorant retards?
I was raised in San Jose, among a group of people that could always be described as....diverse. We didn't just KNOW about other cultures, we REVELED in them. And ALWAYS with respect. We were racers, and the family trooped off to the Pacific Northwest several times for racing series, and we met even MORE different people! It was a blast. In Washington State, they played BOTH anthems before the races because of the large numbers of Canadians there, and we stood RESPECTFULLY, at attention for them. Eventually we even learned the words to "Oh, Canada" and happily sang along with our neighbors and friends to the North. And when we went over the border to THEIR country, the favor and courtesy was ALWAYS returned, should some ignorant Canadian feel the need to sit back down during the Star Spangled Banner, we never even had the time to get offended, because one of their own would instruct them in courtesy, sometimes making their point via a left hook.
Come to think of it, we did the same should some putz feel "Oh, Canada" wasn't worthy of his respect.
And now, we have thousands booing the anthem of our neighbors.
To be fair, some of the crowd sang along to it and tried to drown out the idiots, but there was far too many of them. To those who attempted, good job. To those who did NOTHING?
You're a disgrace to the USA, the state of California, and most especially to that wonderful city of my youth where we were taught to respect and appreciate the differences in the many cultures of this world.
San Jose, you make me ashamed to admit I'm from there.....
The assholes who were booing, they're assholes, plain and simple, classless, brainless, and most likely dickless.
The ones who just sat there and let them do it?
You're the ones who should be ashamed of yourselves.

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!

From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee!!!!

I vow I will NEVER allow any of my fellow Americans to be so rude in MY presence!
I salute my great neighbor to the North!!
And Sharks fans, you've just started a war against an entire country.
Every single hockey fan in Canada is united AGAINST you, they'll be wearing their maple leafs proud tonight, hoping to see your rudeness eliminated from the playoffs this year. A sea of red and white awaits you in Edmonton!!! A nation unites to mock you for your stupidity.
Good job of getting them riled up, you idiots.

Craptacular Classic of the Week!!!

Xanadu.
Oh yes, I've heard the various legends and myths of such a place.
But who in their right mind ever thought this was the right way to put it on screen?
Even though it was named differently, Lost Horizon featured a neat paradise,
one I wouldn't mind hanging out in. But this?
Let me backtrack.
Imagine you're a Hollywood producer and it's 1980.
"Hey, Charlie, we need a new idea. We gotta make a hit."
"Well, slashers are hot now, but I don't think they'll last. I think a musical could be big."
"You're right! We did that white kids in a disco thing for Saturday Night Fever,
with John Travolta, and it was HUGE!"
"Yeah, and we did the black kids in a disco thing with Donna Summer,
and that sold real good!"
"Don't forget the 50's revival with Grease and John Travolta
and Olivia Newton John, major moneymaker!!"

(note, these gentleman are obviously oblivious to the steaming pile
known as Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band? Now back to our geniuses.)

"Hey, I GOT IT! A magical roller disco with Olivia Newton John AND Gene Kelley!!
Whaddaya say?"
"Sid, you're a GENIUS!!!"
Now if someone had beaten these gentlemen with a tire chain, before going
on to finish the job with a monkey wrench, the world could have been spared
the retina burning sights of this flick.
I won't go into the horribly silly plot (She's a muse, and he's an artist...who wants to build a roller disco?),
but we'll start with the whole concept: It was 1980!!!! Disco was DEAD.
Kaput.
There was this stuff called punk.
Way cooler than disco.
But our geniuses had an ace up their sleeves!
The SOUNDTRACK!
They took the effort to hire Jeff Lynne and ELO to write it.
Too bad Jeff and Co. were already yesterday's news.
The Last Train From Bloatsville.
Competent, but miles away from being cool.
Did they consider that Olivia's voice was ill suited to their music?
Nah, as long as the check was good.
So we have an epic bloated soundtrack, to go with a movie
that started filming without a finished script.
I'm serious.
Ask Olivia Newton John.
Written as they went.
We got a 40's dance sequence with Gene Kelley that meant nothing.
We got Olivia rollerskating around the beach boardwalk for no reason.
(yeah, mystical muses do that all the time I think)
We got costumes that can still send epileptic children into seizures.
We got huge sets, a million dancers, singers, jugglers, roller skaters, etc.
And it made zero sense.
And it made zero cents.
Flopperoonie!
So it disappeared into the dustbin of history.
Good riddance.
But I picked up the ELO Box Set (yeah, they're still pretty good musicians, not as cool as they once were, but hey)
It had their version of Xanadu on it.
It's a pretty good pop song.
It got me thinking, was it REALLY that bad of a movie?
So I found it at Scarecrow Video.
Oh dear god, it's every bit as horrible as I remembered.
And I noticed things the kid in me never did.
Like Olivia can't dance to save her life.
(I never noticed that when I lusted after her then)
Ginger Rogers coulda mopped up the floor with her.
Gene Kelley looked really old in it.
The FX are horribly dated.
Even for 1980, I mean.
Wretched, wretched, wretched.
It's...
A THREE FLUSHER!!

It woulda been four, but damn, Olivia sure was a cutie back then.